Relax, Get to It! Thursday, Nov 29 2012 

Over the Thanksgiving Holiday I had time to ponder all the things in my life I have to be thankful for, I realized that I need to relax a bit and let myself enjoy all the good things in my life and not stress out about the big and little things that normally stress me out.  And that is so much easier said than done.  Perhaps writing it down will help.  Perhaps not.  Either way, I am writing it down.

I am a worrier.  Always have been, always will be.  I work hard to get what I want. I want things to be right and for everyone to do their part.  When everyone doesn’t do their part, or mayhap the part I think they should do, I tend to tighten up.  If things really go off course and ‘whatever’ is not completed or accomplished, then tighten up is not a strong enough term to describe me.  So it should be no surprise to anyone that knows me at all that stress and worry is a daily part of my life and its impact can spill over onto others around me.

That being said, I can also ‘let things go’ that I cannot control, after putting out a mammoth effort to control it. This is not the same as giving up. If I give it my best and cannot change the outcome, or if other humans are involved and I cannot control the outcome, I can let things go and stop inserting myself into whatever the situation may be.  It is not easy.  And sometimes my tummy will be upset over it.  But I can still relax out of it.  And watch from a distance.  Just in case.

I come by this over worry naturally.  My mother has a syndrome with a name too long to mention that is about being overcautious and worrying that is derived from being a child forced into responsibility too early.  And, while she did not mean to impart this issue to me, years of carefully worded concerns, cautions, warnings and rules, along with sudden air intake and other signs of worry left a deep imprint on me that for years I did not know was there.  My first child status also plays a part I’m sure, as well as being female, as both my younger brothers were not as imprinted as I.  My husband and sons were the ones to point out that my standard goodbye salutation to everyone is always ‘be careful’.  I’d been saying that for years without even knowing it.

But I am getting off point, if I ever had a point, which is relaxing a bit and being thankful.  Because I am thankful for many things in my life.  Some are small and may seem insignificant, but are not.  Some are large and seem significant, but aren’t.  Regardless of the size or the significance, I am lucky to have things for which I am thankful. I have a home, a comfortable life, an old husband (meaning we’ve been together a long time), and things I like to do, I mainly get to do.  I live in a country that allows me the freedoms many females do not get in other countries, and I am thankful for that.  I try not to take it for granted. I have people in my life I love.

As 2012 slides toward the end of existence, relaxation and thankfulness are my goals.  I’ll save the stress for the Fiscal Cliff.

Shadow Chase Sunday, Oct 28 2012 

Taking off from Denver one afternoon last week, the sky was blue and the sun was shinning.   The plane’s shadow mirrored our moves, skimming over the ground for miles as we climbed, keeping pace with us as we winged our way to Seattle.

I watched the shadow ripple over items on the ground.  It slid over grass, dirt, roads, parking lots, shopping malls, and trees; touching living and inanimate things. It climbed buildings, raced cars, mimicked other planes and covered people; contacting moving and stationary objects.  It passed over a man loading gear into the back of his car. It passed over two of a string of bike riders.  It passed over large tree canopies and was larger than small groupings of newly planted trees.  It raced up the side of a mountain and sped into the valley on the other side.  The shadow created a brief moment of shade where there had been none before and left brightness in its wake.

The higher we went, the harder the shadow tried to stay condensed into the shape of a plane.  Its efforts were not successful as its sharp, recognizable plane edges blurred into an elongated blob and its dark distinctive gray lightened, almost pixelated, as we traveled along.

The cityscape quickly gave way to countryside and the shadow paid no attention, remaining focused on its own agenda.  It skimmed along, touching what it pleased. It raked over the land, watched by me, but apparently invisible to others.  The shadow was not influenced and as it faded away, it left no trace of its existence.  Although it served as a connection between all the things it encompassed after it was created on that sunny Monday afternoon, its touch was benign, leaving no harm in its wake.

Doing Nothing & Lovin’ It Monday, Oct 8 2012 

When was the last time you spent a day doing nothing?  It has been a long time for me and that’s what I did today.  NothingNadaZeroZilch.  Thank you Federal Holiday, spouse out of town  traveling, and the rest of the gang out of the house day!  Even the cats and dogs kept a low profile.  LOL.  In this day and time when everything is connected and we seem to be on call for work, family and friends 24/7, I actually had a day that was out of touch, disconnected and lazy.

I slept late.  Not an all day thing, just late.  Was up about 9:15.  Might had slept longer but the lawn service didn’t have the day off.  Fed the pets.  I read a book.  Remember those?  Paper thingy with a binding, cover from and back….not electronic downloads or audio recordings.  Even got a little paper cut.  I think I was out of practice.   Reviewed some genealogy stuff.  The 1940 census is indexed ya know.  Watched Ben Affleck give an interview on TV.  He turned 40 this year.  Still looks hot!  Very relaxing to look at. 🙂

Is it really so important that we stay connected every minute?  Or clean the house on a holiday?  I think not.  But then I’m not having deep thoughts today.

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